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Who's the greatest public figure or corporation you've ever taken on and how did that work out for you?
Britney Spears. So far I don't think she's noticed we've been slagging her off. When she does I expect the writs to fly faster than she drops her pants for her fans.
Which disease would you least like to see cured?
Ignorance. We'd lose our target market.
What TV or radio commercial most challenges your intelligence and treats you like a moron?
Surely that's a self-contradictory paradox? The whole point of advertising is to sell crap we don't need to people dumb enough to think they need it.
Critics have suggested your site does little more than steal traffic from so-called "legitimate" news sites. Are you a weapon of mass distraction?
I damn well hope so! We're talking about Fox and CNN, right? Anyone who expects these impartial, independent news networks to provide them with balanced and accurate reporting really should get out more. 'Real' news is the illegitimate offspring of political power and big business. Satire cuts through the lies and dissimulation to reveal the underlying truth behind the news.
How will your epitaph read?
Reader, pass on! - don't waste your ire
On fabricated news and bitter satire;
What I was you can read in my drawers,
And what I am is no concern of yours.
Ever dated a really hot chick?
Every time I look in the mirror.
What's the strangest topic you've ever written about?
An Alien with two willies in the grip of a serious chocolate addiction.
What nation provides the most satire material?
America. Many Americans have a constitutional inability to laugh at themselves, which makes it irresistible to do it for them.
What nation provides the second most satire material?
Texas. Many Texans have a constitutional inability to laugh at themselves, which makes it irresistible to do it for them.
What's the greatest source of your inspiration?
The follies of men.
Boxers or briefs?
Neither, Utterpants is run by a modern, freedom-loving women; I don't wear any knickers.
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Utterpants
